so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
