i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
and you fell through a lawn chair
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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