like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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