i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize