I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize