Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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