Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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