just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
