I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
