I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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