honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
wanna go halves on a baby?
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
