I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
