I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
