i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Randomize
