stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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