Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
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