She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
