we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
