Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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