We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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