hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
