masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
