Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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