Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
