Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
