we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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