but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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