who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
