Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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