idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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