Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
