So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize