Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
