I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
