We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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