Walk of Shame. In a state park.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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