Pregnant stripper...not hot.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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