did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
