Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
