dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
True strength comes from lack of pants
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
