Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
