My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
