How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
He told me they were just razor bumps!
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
