Its about making memories worth repressing
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
