I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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