Whod you bang
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
