With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
