he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
