whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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