My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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