I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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