I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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